Friday's Edge: Hey, the jokes are on us (again)

It's Friday, which means we gladly turn over this space to our readers – or at least people claiming to be our readers – to share with us some of their favorite jokes. Of course, we can't print most of them, but here's a couple we can, the first an oldy but a goody courtesy of regular contributor (well, twice, at least) Marjorie Olsen of Beaverton.

"Bless me Father, for I have sinned. I have been with a loose girl."

The priest asks, "Is that you, little Joey Pagan?"

"Yes, Father, it is."

"And who was the girl you were with?"

"I can't tell you, Father. I don't want to ruin her reputation."

"Well, Joey, I'm sure to find out her name sooner or later so tell me now. Was it Tina Morris?"

"I cannot say."

"Was it Teresa Masterson?"

"I'll never tell."

" Cathy Price?"

"My lips are sealed."

"Rene Jameson, then?"

"Please, Father, I cannot tell you."

The priest sighs.

"You're very tight lipped, and I admire that. But you've sinned and have to atone. You cannot be an altar boy now for four months.

"Now you go and behave yourself."

Joey walks back to his pew, and his friend slides over and whispers, "What'd you get?"

"Four months vacation and four good leads."

And this one we actually haven't heard before, from Dean Greiner.

There's a small town on the southern Oregon coast with two claims to fame: a research facility doing studies on porpoises and being the winter home for a small circus. The circus animals are very old and inactive. On the other hand, researchers have found that feeding seagulls to the porpoises will let them live forever. The only drawback is the porpoises have to be fed at exactly the same time each day (bear with us here).

One day, a researcher found an older lion lying on the trail to the beach. Since he had to feed the porpoises at a specific time, he leaped over the lion and got to the shore.

The next day, the sheriff presented an arrest warrant to the researcher. The charge -- "transporting gulls across a staid lion for immortal porpoises."

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